are you a friend?
I’ve thought a lot lately about what constitutes a friend. I haven’t really come up with any good definitions. If anything I’ve read and enjoyed several fun sayings about what a “friend” is. For instance: “A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail, but your best friend is the one sitting next to you saying ‘that was awesome!’” I’m sure you’ve heard a lot of fun, similar sayings.
You know, I feel like I have a lot of friends. I’ve been sitting at Ugly Mugs,a local coffeeshop, for about an hour and at least 15 people have come up to talk to me. When I see people I know, I give real hugs and not side-hugs. I laugh hard. I listen to stories. I buy people coffee. I encourage. Sometimes I give high fives. I feel like I do a lot for the people I know.
In the story of Moses, Aaron and Hur (Moses friends) didn’t just do things for Moses, they supported him by holding up his arms (Exodus 17:8-16). I think a lot of us have missed it when we think of friendship. I think a lot of us would do things for people, but we don’t or won’t support them.
The one thing I haven’t done as much as I should is support my friends. I think we can do a lot for people, but doing is never the same as supporting. Supporting means to help people overcome or “bear all or part of the weight of.” Doing means “performing” or “acting.” I guess in the very end, I don’t want to be known as someone who performs well, I want to be known as someone who helped people overcome.
Sad to say but someties you find out who your “real” friends are when you are in a crisis. The true test of friendship is if given the opportunity would you do the same for friends that you expect from them if you were in need (whatever that need may be). Would you lay down your life, give them all you had, take them in if they were homeless, feed them when they are without food, take time out of your schedule to care for them when they are sick. Some of us wouldn’t do it for a family member let alone a friend!
hey cyndi. unfortunately you are right. in the face of adversity many people flee and leave a friendship. i’ve dealt with that a lot in my life. i’m trying to be the kind of friend that doesn’t. please keep me in your prayers with it.
Its hard to find true friends these days. People are so selfish and when you love them they take advantage. It sucks but Jesus let people walk all over him. Even to death.
thanks austin. what a great reminder.
Dude.. great post. You know for so long we were the people that our friends where helping out. So after 3.5 years its nice to be able to be the people to try and help our friends out. Not that we feel like we have to “make up” to them for everything they did but… now that we are able to we want to be engaged in our friends lives. If that means helping them out then so be it.
Not sure if tha made any sense.
bro. it makes total sense. you are such a good man. i’m sure you are such a great friend to so many. it’s been such an honor getting to know you on here. thanks for being you man.