Matthew Costner

1) Actually Care – Are you Friends on facebook and other social sites? Let’s face it, anybody can add numbers to their Twitter followers, but building an online community goes beyond that to caring holistically about the person. This involves doing what you can to get to know the person better. Not stalking them, but seeking to get to know them better. This won’t happen if you don’t care to begin with.

2) Respond/Comment – There’s no way you can get to know someone if you aren’t in communication with them. Communication is the key to establishing any relationship even if it is online. Ask questions; answer questions; encourage; support. Once you get to know someone then you can joke, but be careful joking at first. It’s hard to hear the tone in someone’s voice when you are only reading.

3) Move On – If someone isn’t in to you, then move on to someone that is. There are millions of people on Twitter, Facebook, and MySpace, and if only a fraction of those are interested in being your online buddy then that is still more than you need to actually be a friend. The beauty of social sites is that people who care can get connected and grow. Also, if they don’t care, then you no longer have to follow. 

So, how serious are you at building community online? Do you do it to feed an ego or to meet and get to know people?