Matthew Costner

Recently, it seems that most of the people I have talked to are looking for some sort of direction in their life. Last night I was at a friend’s house for awhile, and the majority of my time there we talked about what we hoped to accomplish in 2008 and beyond. Not necessarily looking at New Year’s resolutions, but thinking about life in the big picture; like long term future. My friends are around 30, and so most of the time we end our conversations with the saying, “well, we aren’t getting any younger!” You know, that’s not only true for me and my buddies, but that’s true for everyone.

Each year whether we like it or not, and trust me I don’t like it, we get older. I like looking at pictures of me and my family and as I was home over the holidays I walked around the house looking at all the pictures my parents had plastered all over the walls and that were sitting on desks and tables. When I am sitting around the house bored, I also like to check out different people’s blogs to see what is going on in their life or at least their head, see their pictures, and if I am still bored, I catch myself looking at all my friend’s pictures on facebook and myspace. Now, I say all this to say that the only thing that is constant, other than me being addicted to looking at pictures, is that everyone is getting older.

As we get older it becomes easy to start comparing what we have to what others around us our same age has, and sometimes even get angry that we aren’t further along in our life than we see them being. So what do we do, or maybe I should say what do I do? I start worrying about the direction I should be going in my life to catch up with them or if it is someone I feel in competition with, pass them in the materialistic category. I don’t know if Jesus ever compared Himself to the people around Him (I doubt it), but it seems as though He searched and pondered where He was to go next on His journey or ministry. All through the Gospels, Jesus goes to God in prayer before making decisions on where to go next or what to do, and where we come to today in Mark there is no difference. In Mark 1:35-39, Jesus wakes up early, goes and prays, and then tells the disciples that they are all going to the next town together. I can’t help but laugh at this and picture all the disciples cheering that they are about to go on a fun trip…. Can’t you hear them yelling road trip?!

What has to grab our attention though is that Jesus seemed to be so confident that God would point Him in the right direction, He not only went far away from his friends to make sure He didn’t get distracted by them wanting something, but He stayed in prayer until He was satisfied with the outcome. I don’t know how long that was, because Scripture doesn’t tell us, but it was long enough that the disciples got worried about Him, and He was clear and certain that He was to leave Capernaum. Now, I love to pray, and I feel like I pray all the time, but my prayers seem to be pretty short. I get straight to the point, then I say Amen and I am done. Maybe what I am trying to say here is that I don’t really take the time to listen for God to always give me direction; I talk, but I don’t let God.

I say this all the time, but it’s hard for me to admit that I can’t do everything on my own. I really want to be able to make decisions, go and make it happen, and then be able to say look what I have done. And I do that unfortunately more than I should, but usually when I am saying look at what I have done, it is prefaced with the words “uh-oh.” Why? Because alone, I make decisions that are selfish and based on what I think is best. I don’t know how you make decisions or what goes into your decision making, but if we believe Scripture and accept it as the authority then we know that God sees the big picture so to speak. Therefore, why wouldn’t we go to Him, seeking His advice on what to do and where to go, knowing that since He sees everything He would obviously know best.

The difficulty comes then in staying in conversation with God long enough to hear Him answer. I know the days get long and busy, but the older I get the more I realize that my life would be much easier and less stressful if I only had to do things once. Instead of trying my way the first 15 times before I let God give it a try, I think I am going to try and let God start helping me with my decisions first. After-all, if He knows best (and not your momma), then why wouldn’t anyone want to do anything that isn’t the “best” first?

As the New Year approaches, I truly wish us all the best! But for that to happen, we all have to make sure we seek the answers from the One that knows best. Guess I am going to need to listen a little bit more… How about you?